My Tribute to Paula

I met Paula this summer after she came to live with my landlord.  The first time I met her she was watching cartoons.  Sponge Bob was one of her favorites! Although I've only known her for a short period of time, I know our paths crossing was God's will..  She and my landlord have known each other over twenty years.  They use to work together in a hospital here in Phoenix. From what Paula's mom told me, Paula use to be a fun and carefree person.  She was spontaneous and did a lot of traveling. From my conversations with Paula, I learned that she was a very independent person who loved the outdoors.  We talked about me taking her to the botanical gardens in the fall when it got cooler.  Now Paula had become a dependent person who stayed indoors.  The reason being is that she had brain cancer.  She was diagnosed with it a little over a year ago after experiencing a pain in her leg. She now needed help with daily living activities like going to the bathroom, taking a shower, getting dressed, eating, etc.  She expressed to me how hard it was for her to let people do these things for her because of her independent personality.  I could definitely relate to this.  I too find it hard to be dependent on others, even when I really need help!

The first time I went over to help Paula take a shower, she began to cry and asked me "How do you know when it's time?"  She was referring to death.  I told her none of us know when that time is going to come.  We just know that each of us have a time to go.  I told her the important thing is to know where we are going when that time comes.  She expressed that she wasn't sure, but she hoped that she would go to heaven.  I asked if she wanted to be sure of where she was going and she replied "Yes".  I then led her in prayer of confessing Jesus as her Savior! I believe this was part of God's purpose of our paths crossing. To God be the Glory!

Paula died today (Sept. 1).  As I watched her decline quickly the past couple of weeks, I was reminded of a few things.  One is that God places people in our lives to be a blessing to us.  Although Paula may have thought me helping her was a blessing, she also was a blessing in my life.  It was a blessing for me to be able to serve her with the love of Christ!  I know God had me here to help my landlord with Paula for His glory!  Also, I was reminded that it's okay to let people help you.  At some point in our lives, we all need help.  It doesn't take away from your independence to accept it! Thank you Lord! Lesson learned!

Paula would have been 44 years old on next Friday (September 7th).  We were going to be celebrating her birthday with cake and ice cream.  Now we will be remembering her at a memorial service.  Although my memories of Paula are few, they will be with me for the rest of my life.  One of my memories will be: Paula liked the way I did the tango (that's what she called it when I got her up and we stepped left-right-left-right to get her on her bedside toilet)!  And when I get to heaven, we will tango again (under different circumstances) :-)!

We've all heard the cliche' that "Tomorrow is not promised to anyone."  This became even more of a reality to me today.  On yesterday evening my landlord came to get my car keys to move my car.  I was asleep because I had to go to work last night.  She was sharing with me about Paula's day with the CNA (who hospice had began sending the past week).  I told her that I was going to come over to see Paula "tomorrow" (which would have been today).  I was planning on praying with her and reading Psalm 23 to her. I knew her time was getting close to the end. However, when I got in from work this morning, I got the news that Paula had passed. Of course, I am sad, but I am also regretful that I didn't  go see her yesterday.  I now realize even more how true that cliche' is, along with: "Don't put off for tomorrow, what you can do today"!  Remember, "To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven: A time to be born, and a time to die;"-(Ecclesiastes 3: 1-2a).  Rest in peace, Paula! See you when I get there! I AM HIS!

Here's Paula and I just one week ago!