It’s hard to believe that my graduation is just a month and
a few days away (May 10th).
This past year and ½ has been life changing in more ways than one. Even though, God’s primary purpose for
sending me here was to study at Phoenix Seminary, He had so much more planned
from the beginning. I’ve been keeping
this blog to keep you updated with what’s been going on with me here in Phoenix . While I’ve shared much, there’s so much more
that I haven’t shared…..
Confession Part 1
As most of you may know, my divorce back in 2007 was very
traumatic for me. Although I tried hard
to mask my hurt and pain, I was devastated.
I know I heard clearly from God and was obedient to what He told me to
do. That has not changed. But I never thought in a million years my
marriage would end in divorce. And while
I know divorce wasn’t God’s will, He allowed it to happen for a reason. Some of you witnessed my hurt and pain, and
some of you saw the mask I wore to try hard to disguise it. I was wearing that same mask when I left Louisiana in January 2012 to come to Phoenix .
Yes, five years later the hurt and pain was still there. I know some of you thought it was gone, but it
wasn’t. I hid it behind my mask! However,
I couldn’t hide it from God. Only God
knew my deepest hurts and pains. Yes, He
knew all along, and He had a plan for that too.
While most of my studies have been learning more about God’s Word and
how to study God’s word, God also has had me on a path of healing for my
soul. Throughout my time at Phoenix
Seminary, I’ve taken a series of classes that have helped me to process my hurt
and pain and to allow God to bring His healing to my soul. This semester, God led me to a study group
called Mending the Soul. It’s a program
for healing from different types of abuse.
Initially, I didn’t think what I experienced was “abuse”, but it was. My emotions and spirit had been abused. The hurt and pain I felt was deep down in my
soul and only God could heal it. Only
God knew I was in desperate need of my healing. And He led me to this group which
has been a safe place for me to process my hurt and pain, and my healing. As I’ve been going through the process, I am
experiencing God’s healing in a whole new way.
I am truly getting to know Him to be my Jehovah Rophi (Healer)! I’m in
constant awe of God’s timing and how He orchestrates every aspect of my
life. He continues to reveal Himself to
me in so many ways. It’s been another
amazing part of my journey here in Phoenix !
Confession Part 2
I know some of you are wondering, exactly what am I going to
do after graduation. The answer to that
is….Whatever God tells me to do! I know
that He sent me here to prepare me for whatever work He has for me to do. He needed to equip me with His Word and His
healing. While I know He has a great
purpose, He hasn’t revealed it to me yet.
And this has been one of my biggest challenges. I’m used to having my next move all figured
out. But this time, I’ve totally
surrendered my plans to God’s plans for me.
And when He reveals them to me, I will let you know. Until then, I will
continue to diligently seek Him! I AM
HIS!
